Have you ever had that feeling that you were on the verge of something but not quite sure what? You feel your heart and soul calling out for something, but you just can’t see clearly enough to figure out what it actually is in front of you. It’s like hearing a foreign language and understanding a few words but not the whole story.
That’s how I have been feeling the past 6 months.
Last year was the year of being stripped bare and standing naked in the dark night of the soul.
This year has been all about the awakening, emerging, total presence, love and bliss.
When you have an awakening and your mind has been expanded you can never go back to your old way of thinking and behaving. Because of this I have felt an urgency to wake every one else up also. I want people to know how good it can be and show them that if I can get through the darkness that I have experienced so can they!
I feel as though now is the time to follow my bliss and to shift into a new paradigm. I can’t keep living like I use to, with the same fears and the same patterns repeating themselves.
I’ve also felt really divided and a little lost as to what I should be doing. I had a sense of something big coming but I felt as though everything I had put in place didn’t feel quite right for me and I have been doing too many things. Working different jobs, having two websites, almost being split in two!
I think a lot of this has because I’ve n too scared to actually do what I know I am supposed to be doing. My ego tells me if I follow that path I won’t have money, or I will lose my friends or I will have to let down my guard which may lead to rejection. I was too scared to even use my intuition which I knew was super strong, because I was fearful of what I’d hear! I have a sister who is a psychic medium and with all due respect to her and what she does I was always scared I’d end up like her! I thought if I opened up that gift I’d be seeing dead people everywhere and be surrounded by grief. So I shut it off.
Fear has kept me in my corner for too long. Sure I put myself out there to some extend, and I probably follow my bliss and take risks more than others, but I just couldn’t fully make the jump, I still was holding on for dear life to all these other things.
I started this blog 2 years ago and never imagined it would be still going or that it would have thousands of page views each week. I called it Stilettos and Green Juice as a fun and cute representation of myself and my health journey. It allowed me to write about various topics, but I never really saw it as a business or thought where it could go.
Since starting my blog I also became qualified as a Personal Trainer and Health Coach and decided to launch a Fitness Page on Facebook called Fit Girl Secrets. This grew to a few thousand followers very quickly so decided to launch this as a website to host my fitness services and launch an online program.
In the early days I had visions of replicating The Tone It Up Girl’s success. As a gym junkie myself I wanted to go down the typical fitness girl path but lately I have been feeling as though something isn’t right and I am misaligned in some way.
Through my own personal journey and lightening speed awakening of the past 6 months I just don’t feel it really fits with what I want to promote and teach.
To be honest I don’t give a F*** about having a six pack and I definitely don’t want women coming to me solely to pursue this. The obsession with looking a certain way and our self obsession with showing our abs and asses on instagram makes me sick and I want to ensure I don’t give into that type of online fitness behavior that seems so acceptable.
What I do care about is showing you how to live your truth, how to always stay connected to love, how to step outside of your comfort zone, how to follow your bliss and how to BE love so you can actually love yourself to live a healthy lifestyle! When you are living this way, guess what will happen? You’re body will actually fall to the weight you desire! That’s what my ebook and fitness program are all about. I have always wanted to promote holistic health and fitness.
I will always be passionate about health and fitness but to me there is so much more too it than food and exercise.
I also want to be involved with bringing Epic events to my city that promote the message of love and connection and after being inspired by a US group called The Love Mob, I am hosting Sydney’s first Love Mob.
I am in the process of starting a new business, working with leaders in the transformation industry and helping them get their message out to the world. Having spent over 10 year working in media/marketing/advertising I want to use those skills I picked up to promote love and transformation.
Over the past few weeks I have had more clarity as to who I want to become. How I can really be the change in this world and neither of my websites seem to be really hitting the spot for me. The names aren’t holding a space for me to combine everything that I love. Stilettos and Green Juice shows no representation of what I want to achieve and Fit Girl Secrets doesn’t have enough soul.
So I have decided that I will no longer be posting on Stilettos and Green Juice. It’s actually really sad for me to say that as I have shared so much of my soul on here but I know that I can’t keep up 2 websites which are somewhat similar. This will be my last blog post on this platform. I will keep this site up so you can still visit and I don’t want to lose the hundreds of articles I have written but I will be now only writing in the one place.
Where you will find me is a merging of my two worlds Fitness and Soul into
Fit Soul Secrets.
Fit Girl Secrets will still exist on Facebook and within the “Secrets” Brand but Stilettos and Green Juice on facebook will be changed to Fit Soul Secrets.
I am in the process of re-branding the Fit Girl Secrets website and changing the URL but in the mean time you can still find it at http://www.fitgirlsecrets.com.
If you’ve signed up to my list I will be merging the two so you will see me in your inbox once a week. If you haven’t done that yet, you can still sign up on the right hand side of this page to stay in touch. If you don’t want to receive emails than you are more than welcome to unsubscribe.
Fit Soul Secrets will be about everything that I love to share, Fitness, soulful conversations, mindfulness, love, higher consciousness, manifesting, nutrition, following your bliss, health, wellness and everything in between.
My events/PR and project management business within the transformation and personal development world will take form on another platform very soon.
Thank you for all your support over the past 2 years. This blog was the start of connecting me to my purpose, passion and bliss. I have enjoyed sharing with you and have appreciated all those that have reached out and connected with me. I hope you can follow me along on this journey and hopefully I can meet you soon at one of my live events!
Much Love and Blessings
I have been saying goodbye to all my expensive skin treatments and saying hello to natural home made concoctions that actually do a better job than the store bought varieties that promise the world. Having worked in the beauty department of a magazine I can tell you that all you are paying for is the marketing and packaging!
I want to share with you my favourite skin care treatments that you can find in your kitchen (or are super cheap if you don’t have them).
1 Tablespoon of organic coconut oil
1 Tablespoon of Manuka honey (or the most natural organic honey you can find)
2 Tablespoons of brown sugar (great way to use up your sugar if you’ve gone sugar-free!)
The Juice of half a lemon
Mix all ingredients together, use more Brown sugar if you prefer a more invigorating scrub. Massage over face for a few minutes and wash with warm water.
2 Tablespoons of organic plain Greek yoghurt
1 Tablespoon of Manuka honey
1 Mashed banana
Mix all ingrediants together and apply a thick layer to your face and leave for 15-20 minutes. Rise with warm water and follow with a toner.
If you prefer you can leave out the banana, or try both versions (with and without)
1 Tablespoon of Manuka honey
1 Teaspoon of Coconut oil
Mix together and massage into your face for a few minutes. Leave on for a minute and rinse with warm water, following with apple cider vinegar toner.
Organic Apple cider vinegar
(I use undiluted but if you’re skin is sensitive, you can dilute with one part water)
Wet a cotton wall ball or pad with apple cider vinegar and wipe all over your face and neck. This may sting at first and make your eyes water but it only lasts a minute or so. If you find it too irritating dilute with water.
If you are only going to try one of these remedies, this is the best one to try. Your skin will feel amazing afterwards!
You only need a little of this unless you want to use as a moisturising mask and then wipe off. Otherwise, use a pea size amount and massage into your skin. If you find it too oily, try it only at night. Coconut oil has antibacterial and anti inflammatory properties so this shouldn’t make your skin break out.
1 Teaspoon of Brown sugar
1 Teaspoon of Coconut oil
Optional – a drizzle of Manuka honey
Mix together and massage over your lips with your finger, tooth brush or face washer. Rinse with warm water.
Spot treatment (or any area of inflammation)
Teaspoon of Coconut oil
1/2 Teaspoon of Turmeric
Mix together and apply a small amount to any inflamed area. The first time I tried this I went overboard and had orange towels and bathroom! Use Turmeric sparingly!
Pigmentation or Acne Scars (and red marks)
Juice of 1/2 lemon
(optional) 1 Teaspoon of olive, jojoba or melted coconut oil
Spread over your face evenly and leave on for 15-20 minutes and wash off with warm water. Do not spot treat as this may cause uneven pigmentation. Apply to entire face for gently, even, fading.
Guest Post by Tamara Living
These are tricks that work after you’ve had an argument and find yourself having difficulty moving out of that stuck, stifled, sullen place. They also work if you’re looking for creative inspiration and motivation to get that ‘I’ll do it next week’ job done. I used the same tricks the other day to tackle a case of remorse. Though my example is light in nature, it’s a real case study nonetheless…
Last week I caught myself hovering over my keyboard with meandering fingers. I’d had a week of electrifying, concerted outpouring of the written word. YIPPEE. And then suddenly, I found myself afflicted by wandering attention. I stopped for a brief lunch break and became absorbed in the latest Upworthiest newsletter, watching one you tube, and then another, and then, oh-it’s-only-3-minutes, another. And before I knew it I had turned left, right, left again, round the roundy round about, and then completely all-hope’s-gone lost in an endless labyrinth of video, experiments, entertainment, studies, reports. Finally, I happened upon something I really didn’t need or want to see and was snapped from my reverie, with a very bitter taste in my mouth.
Uggh. How did this happen? I felt as if I’d just emerged into blinding light after hours lost at Bunnings. How did I become a mindless consumer seeking a youtube high? As per the law of physics, my high followed with a crash and I was left moving with heavy mud boots through a quagmire of low energy and remorse for lost time.
And then, the echo of a voice of a close friend of mine tugged me back into the now. ‘If you’ve fallen off the band wagon, don’t waste time getting all guilty about it. Pick yourself up and jump back on’. Like a little light bulb had been flicked, I turned to a tried and true receipe to help me sharpen my attention and resolve again. A little bit of space clearing was in order.
1. Let The Light In
ACTION I opened up all the blinds and threw the windows open wide.
EFFECT That feeling of optimism that comes when a room is flooded with light and fresh air.
THEORY Some very clever science types have been finding that when our eyes are exposed to light our moods and emotional tone is directly impacted, and vampire genealogy aside, the response is all positive.
2. Aromatherapy gets all limbic
ACTION I lit some old hippy trippy incense I found in a forgotten box.
EFFECT Luckily, this was incense of quality essential oil variety, rather than the barbie fake musk variety. True to it’s delicious form, I found the zesty fragrance helped raise my spirits that little bit more.
THEORY They don’t call it aromatherapy for nada. Our clever olfactory system (being our nose smelling skills) has a direct effect on the limbic system – the emotion control headquarters located up there in the cerebrum. Releasing scents that we find uplifting is like triggering a hot wire to happy. (If you’re not into smoky incense or dreamy oils, try a floral or citrus scented facial spray – that stuff is some serious kind of delight; just make sure it’s 100% essential oil derived).
3. Tibetan singing bowl to the rescue
ACTION I pulled down my Bali-sourced, Tibetan singing bowl (go figure..?).
EFFECT Despite it’s origins, the singing part worked a treat. Using a small gong to make the bowl ‘sing’ sent a soothing, melodious keening noise through the air, and gave me something, other than brooding emotions, to focus on. I brought my attention back to now, and used my sense of hearing to slip my awareness straight back into my body and ’the here’.
THEORY So, there’s a couple of theories at play here. One, I applied the marvellous tool of mindfulness to help shift my awareness out of, the past, and into the present. Secondly, and on more of a giddy gypsy note, some of our spiritual sisters among us vouch that bad energy (in whatever form it manifested) needs a bit of help in moving it’s grumpy self along. This is where bells come in handy. Tinkling some bells about the place can help shift and break up lingering energy. This isn’t such a stretch to believe if you think about it. Any ol’ physics class will tell you that sound is produced by vibrating matter. So when we’re jangling bells about the place we’re shaking up air molecules in that space a little bit, and if that helps move ‘stuck’ energy, well then, I’mau fait’ with that.
4. Get your groove on
ACTION I put on some good music
(actually, I listened to Mozart on this occasion, but I’m just as likely to have cranked up Bob Marley, Jack (heaven) Johnson, a bit of vulnerable Birdy, all the single ladies Beyonce, gravelly Muddy Waters, or ol’ school Fleetwood Mac.. apparently my musical tastes are more varied than wide).
EFFECT Regardless, the effect was luminous. Despite ourselves, even if there’s a small part of us that wants to sit with feeling angry or sad or mad, when we open our minds to truly moving music, we simply can’t stay in a space of heaviness. We are lovingly, liberally, uplifted.
THEORY Many different areas and parts of our brains are involved in processing how we hear and respond to music. Though I’m sure none of us truly needed a study to prove it, research has verified that music has a resounding effect in lifting (or reinforcing) our mood. Music as therapy. I like it.
I ended up that day on a high, beginning a whole new project I’d been putting off for months.
Actively changing up the energy in your home or office can shift you into a place of presence, productivity, and power.
We’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment and let us know how do you get out of feeling “stuck”
Big hearted insights on living your inspired life.*indie author*champion for kids*health junkie*recovered creative. I’m Tamara – inspired living children’s author, mindfulness messenger, lover of the creative soul. When I’m not writing, you’ll find me outside soaking up a bit of real, where the non-sensical suddenly makes sense. I’d love to meet you – find me @ http://www.tamaraliving.com
I am a bit of a cosmetic product whore. It goes back to my days working as a Beauty Coordinator for a magazine. I had so many products (all freebies) that I had bags and bags of them cluttering my bedroom and bathroom. Most of which I never used and I had a lot more visitors in those days as everyone left with a bagful of products.
Fast forward 8 years and I still love my cosmetics but I have simplified ALOT and I think my whore status us transferred over to the health food industry rather than make up products! (I am a sucker for the latest superfood – but how many can I actually use in a smoothie at once?)
I have slowly started phasing out my chemical filled cosmetics with natural products and though hard at first, the constant rash on my eyes from using my favourite coloured Sephora eyeshadow just wasn’t worth the fashion risk. (I love Sephora but what are they putting in their eyeshadows?!)
So I sucked it up and persevered with minerals. I recently wrote a popular blog post on my favourite minerals you can read here. But to expand on this I wanted to share with you a product I adore. Now back in my magazine days I tried desperately hard to like minerals. Having problem skin I thought it was my saving grace but all the brands I tried (and back then there weren’t many) were so cakey and flakey). I also noticed on friends how there mineral make up sat in their lines around their eyes and made them look so much older. I tried mixing with moisturiser but this just didn’t cut it.
Luckily minerals have come along way but I was super dopper excited when I found a product that DOES NOT CAKE OR GO FLAKY! Yep it’s the bomb. Now when I say “found” I will be clear here, I was sent the product for free by the brand after writing my last mineral blog post. I like to be clear on that, yes brands do send me things, but I will never write about them unless I love the product (or feel it’s worth talking about)
So moving on, let me tell you why I will actually buy this product when it runs out.
It’s Adorn Cosmetics Hydrating Mineral Make up. It’s not a powder so it has the consistency of a compact foundation and is full of nourishing goodies like jojoba oil, Shea Butter and Grapefruit Extracts to prevent the the cakey look. You apply with a brush and it gives a beautiful dewy finish but if you prefer matte just use a light dusting of their mineral powder over the top.
The sound of the oils might freak you out, but lets remember something, oil fights oil, so the right type of oil won’t clog your pores. I am battling acne and cleanse my skin with oil (and it works for me). My skin has been so much clearer since using it and I have not needed concealer as the coverage is build-able and has done a great job covering my red acne scars. If my skin looks too oily then at the end of the day I dust over powder.
So that’s my rant on my new favourite foundation. They have a large range of products and I have also tried their powders, eye shadow and lipstick which are all winners. Check them out http://www.adorncosmetics.com.au
I am pretty excited to announce the launch of my first health and fitness program “Body Breakthrough”.
I am really proud of this program, because I was sick of seeing fitness programs on the market that were extreme “shredder” programs and focused so much on getting a “Bikini Body!”. Sure they may get you results in a short time but how long will those results last?
One of the most important aspects of getting fit is creating the mindset that frees you from the negative thinking that is most probably causing your weight gain. That is why I have a whole section on mindset with tips on breaking free from the old patterns of thinking. And of course there is meal plans, a nutritional guide, recipes and a 6 week exercise program for gym and outdoor/home training (print outs and videos)
Grab your copy or find out more on Fit Girl Secrets HERE:
Today I wanted to share with you a little excerpt from my program…….
You can Buy Program at http://www.fitgirlsecrets.com
There was a time in my life when I hated myself so much I wanted to hurt myself. Maybe it wasn’t so much a hatred for myself, but more so a feeling I felt because I was so trapped in my pain. I would punch myself as an only escape from what I was feeling. Some days I wanted to run a knife through my skin. I just wanted it out so badly and it would leave my body in a explosive hatred towards my being.
It makes me cry to even imagine myself in that state. It’s almost hard to believe I could have ever felt that way, and I understand it is hard for many others to understand the mindset of self-harm.
Although that hatred does not exist in this moment, tonight it all came flashing back to me as I experienced a really moving Kundalini class. Our class exercises were all centered around opening the heart and removing the blocks that keep us guarded.
Tonight we practiced the art of blessing ourselves. A very simple meditation practice but something that had me in tears. We sang along to the lyrics, “I bless myself, I bless myself, I am, I am” while we placed our hands on every inch of our body.
At first I smiled along with this meditation but soon the memory of those self-harm days came flooding back to me and it saddened me to my core, that I could have ever been anything but loving to my body.
What I also realised, was that I had been doing this very practice somewhat subconsciously for some time now in my meditations so it seemed that my soul knew what to do. When I meditate by myself sometimes the energy is so strong that my hands move over my head and move back down. The first time this happened it frightened me as my arms were moving by themselves and It was the most bizarre thing. The energy was so strong it was as though someone had hold of my arms and was moving them for me.
Of course the mind gets in the way and the fear put a stop to it. But the motion I was making was like I was anointing myself. Then last week it happened again but this time the energy went up to my face and the areas I have been having skin issues. I was in a trance-like state so didn’t even realise what I was doing, this time there was no fear and I allowed spirit to take over.
It wasn’t until this meditation tonight that I realized that I had been blessing myself and sending love and healing to the places that needed it. It always amazes me how when you allow your “higher self”, your spirit, soul or God within to take over, you will find that all the healing and love you are looking for is within you.
Leaving the class I felt a little fragile and I wondered how many other women would be healed from regularly blessing themselves. If it could stir up such emotions in me, at this stage of my life when I am feeling pretty loved and peaceful, then what would it do for those women who were really struggling in their skin.
So I wanted to share this with you to be open to practicing this meditation regularly. I know it will now be part of my meditation practice.
I want you to find yourself a quiet place, sitting cross legged or whatever is comfortable for you. Spend a few moments with your hands in prayer position in front of your heart center.
Play this song which I found on youtube but you may be able to download it somewhere. Then place your hands wherever you may feel guided. You may concentrate on one area or cover every part of your body.
At first you may feel uncomfortable or silly, but please get out of your head for a moment and just go with it. Even if you don’t feel the love, please allow yourself just a few minutes to give your body what it really needs. This will be more powerful for you then any diet, any health or fitness regime.
Blessing and much love
I sat with my arm stretched out in front of me fighting back the tears from being the pain. I had to fight my mind telling me this wasn’t normal, that I should give up, but I knew that I had to find the calm in the chaos
This was meditation.
This was life.
I have found myself back to what I believe my soul needs - Kundalini. I have had many fights with Kundalini, resisting it, and telling myself that it was bringing up too much negativity, but it is always calling my name. Now I understand why it does bring up a lot of negativity and that’s not a bad thing. Some things just need to get out and Kundalini has this incredible power to do this. It brings it up and then it heals.
The thing with Kundalini is that it forces you to find peace in the pain. Most of the meditation practices are incredibly uncomfortable. I am not talking normal yoga pose uncomfortable, I mean you may actually cry it’s that unbearable. But then it follows with such a sense of achievement.
So as I sat there holding my arm in front of me for the longest 8 minutes of my life trying to keep my mind calm I realised how far I had come.
In some ways it seems like an eternity since I wrote to you about being stripped bare and the pain I went through last year. Then other times it seems like just yesterday. All I know is I couldn’t be further away from that place. The past 6 months have been such an awakening that I pinch myself about all that I have been manifesting. It’s like I finally get it. I finally get what it feels like to feel pure bliss and joy for no reason at all.
Some people I meet now think that I have always been this way, only few in my life remember picking me up from the bathroom floor or listening to me cry with such a deep hopeless sorrow.
But in those tears my heart was breaking open and I was being stripped bare to build a completely new dimension of myself.
I often get asked how I got through it, or people I meet somehow know they can share their deepest pain and secrets with me. They always want me to tell them the miracle quick fix. All I can say is, you have to do the work and you have to be consistent.
If you do the work, if you’re consistent and show up every day, you will hit the sweet spot.
“The work” may look different for everyone. What worked for me, may not work for you.
“The work” is something that needs to be done daily, if not with every breath and is not something you only find in a weekend personal development seminar.
That’s where people give up. They get so high on a quick fix but then they can’t transfer it into their everyday moments.
One thing I know for sure is “The work” involves feeling the pain. At least in the beginning.
I think feeling the pain, allowing it, honouring it and having compassion for it, is where the miracle happens.
Everyone tries to avoid this feeling so will try techniques to run around it, but you must run straight into it.
That’s what Kundalini practice teaches you, you have to get into the pain to allow your mind to react differently towards in.
I think the reason I have come such full circle is the past year is because I actually cried for the longest time. I felt the pain more than I have ever in my life. I just let it out, I showed it to people, I stopped hiding it.
So I want to ask you how badly do you want to change your situation? Are you willing to do the work? Are you willing to commit to a practice, whatever that may look like for you? Are you ready to stop making excuses?
Eventually it doesn’t feel like work at all. In the beginning the last thing I wanted to do was meditate, or do EFT or talk to anyone about it. All the things I knew would help, but I couldn’t bear to be alone with myself or even take a look at it. But I did it anyway. Sometimes I just sat there in silence, other days I could feel a flicker of peace and light.
But now I look forward to my meditation time. I can’t get enough of it and wake up early for it! For me, a lot of my work gets done through meditation. It gives me a high that I crave. All the work I have done on myself has allowed me to stay in the present moment and have less attachment to outcomes, people or circumstances.
When you know you have work to be done, you’re not going to want to do it, you will have major resistance and your ego will give you every reason to give up, but I truly believe you are stronger than that.
I don’t want to list what doing the work means, In fact you may even hate that term “work”. Call it something else if you need to. I know the right method will come to you, just put an intention out into the universe to find something that will work for you. It will come to you! (Kundalini chased me down until I couldn’t ignore it! All my teachers and healers have come to me this way too)
Be consistent. Give yourself a chance, you are so worth showing up for.
Believing in you and much love
For more fitness inspiration check out my fitness website Fit Girl Secrets – I will be doing less fitness and diet blog posts here so make sure you follow on Facebook or sign up to Fit Girl Secrets for your Free Quickie Guide for quick workouts, meal ideas and recipes.
Last year I posted a blog about my Kinesiology session with the extraordinary light that is Ani Neradilkova. Ani (pronounced Unyee) and I went to school together but hadn’t seen each other since until the universe literally dropped her back into my life in a very random meeting. (Don’t you love when that happens!) It was one of those moments that I knew was not just a chance meeting as the night before I had literally prayed to God to send me help and boom she appeared! She has been such a light to me in so many ways.
I really want to share Ani with the world not just because I am lucky enough to have been blessed with her friendship but because her work, combining Kinesiology, energy work and sound makes her a force to be reckoned with. This girl knows how to cut through the crap and I speak from experience in saying that she will bring it out and heal it, just like that.
We share the same vision in empowering and inspiring women so I can see the two of us doing a lot of work together in the future. For now I want you to get to know Kinesiologist and singer/songwriter Ani Neradilkova aka Anikiko.
Did you know that the best way to treat oily skin is with oil? I think in the past year I have tried everything to clear my skin after coming off the pill and the natural approach is by far winning.
What I realized was happening with most cleansers (especially those that are designed to treat acne) was that they were actually stripping my skin (even the gentle ones). My skin would then go into overdrive to repair by producing more oil leading to a vicious cycle.
I had stumbled across a blogger raving about clearing her skin using natural oils like Jojoba or castor oil so I looked into it a little more.
Turns out it has been an effective treatment for acne for many people. It also balances out the skin for those that experience sensitivity or dryness.
The method involves massaging natural oil into your skin to dissolve oil and impurities such as make up, then you remove the oil with a steaming hot towel which opens up the pores to allow a deeper cleanse of impurities. (more…)